I rarely mention the Olivers, as often I forget that they are in the show! But, something happened tonight during the group song, in that I suddenly realised that there is a wealth of talent in the final set of lads. It will be hard for Cameron to decide, I would imagine, as they are all strong. Although I would say goodbye to the little blonde lad who sounds too Welsh for Oliver. “Please Sir Can I Have Some More?” What would Mr Bumble reply: “Tidy?”

The Nancy mission this week was acting but more than that; comedy. Each of the girls took part in a comedy workshop led by Phil Jupitas. After viewing the footage Phil said that Jessie needed some work. Rachel received praise for doing confusion well. she has had enough practice, ending up in the sing off! Sam, as I suspected over-acted. Her character was supposed to be weak, yet she went in all cocky.

Niamh received praise for improvising and Jodie was described as “fantastic” (and John was nowhere to be seen!).

The group number was “I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Out Of My Hair” from South Pacific. This involved some movement in a bath tub. (more…)

Someone I don’t know has paid £8,000 to attend the first night of Marguerite this week in my company. The money — raised by auction at a charity bash — goes to the Hampstead Theatre while the prize also includes a dinner in Joe Allen’s with yours truly after the event.

Which prompts a variation of the old gag: first prize, a night out with a theatre critic; second prize, two nights out with a theatre critic…  

The unlucky winner in this instance is a businessman and Hampstead Theatre supporter called Simon Palley, who sounds a jolly nice chap over the telephone. Unfortunately, Simon now has an unavoidable business commitment on Tuesday night, so he’s sending along his young brother instead.

I hope we find each other quickly in the Haymarket portico, else I might be arrested for soliciting young men on the off chance they go by the name of Joseph Palley.

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After Ashley’s untimely exit last week and the younger Nancys definitely flavour of the month with the Lord, what would the girls pull out of the bag tonight? Incorporated into the show was a stint from some of the Josephs, but more on that later. For now, which Nancy is still a contender?

Jodie sang “Holding Out For a Hero” from the film and stage show, Footloose. Andrew wanted to see how well she could move this week. She moved ok, but vocally she was very flat and nasally. I thought it was the worst performance she had ever done. The judges thought differently as John liked it, as did Barry with his back-handed compliment “You’ve been round the block a bit.” DVO claimed it was perfect and Andrew, obviously realising that his rudeness equals more than two phone votes to save his ‘victim’ said she danced “like Meatloaf.” This was uncalled for and John Barrowman gallantly stuck up for her.

Rachel had put up with a bit of stick last week and was determined to wow the judges and the audience at home. She sang X Factor/American Idol favourite “I Will Always Love You.” Vocally, it was excellent and felt like a two fingered salute to Barry and Andrew. I could really see her playing the role after this. But the judges clearly ring in the comments every week, as Barry said she hits an “emotional ceiling.” (more…)

Mobile phones going off in theatres are a fact of life nowadays, but five going off around me at the first night of Peter Hall’s magnificent revival of Pygmalion at the Old Vic (one belonging to a critic) was a bit of a record.

We’ve all been there. My mobile went off during a quiet bit of an opera in Edinburgh a few years ago. But nothing compares to the sweat you break out into when you discover your phone was on all the time as you leave the theatre.

I’m so paranoid about this now that I double check my phone even when I know I turned it off as I entered the foyer. It’s quite common, though, to find yourself sitting next to someone who looks at their messages on silent during the play, oblivious to the visual distraction such behaviour entails.

Theatres should instal sin boxes for offenders to drop in a fiver when they’ve transgressed. Most people are so embarrassed they would be only too happy to make such a contribution to the theatre’s restoration fund.

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[Show as slideshow]

On Wednesday night Whatsontage.com Theatregoers were treated to a sold out trip to the Haymarket to see the last in Jonathan Kent’s three production season, Marguerite. The new musical is a love story set in Paris during the Second World War. Marguerite is the beautiful and notorious mistress of a high ranking German officer stationed in the French capital, but she loosed her heart to a young musician with close ties to the resistance. As their love becomes stronger the war rages around them, making their secret meetings ever more dangerous.

This was one of the largest Outings Whatsonstage.com has undertaken. The event was so popular that we had to increase our allocation of tickets twice. In the end over 230 Theatregoers joined us to watch the heart wrenching musical love story unfold. (more…)

I am hoping to watch the first day of the Test Match series with New Zealand at Lord’s tomorrow and said as much to Tom Erhardt, the distinguished agent — quite unbelievably, he’s just turned eighty — at the first night of The Deep Blue Sea.

“Oh, I don’t know anything about cricket,” he said. Well, he is American. But as most of his clients including David Hare, Howard Brenton, Christopher Hampton et al are all cricket fanatics - as indeed are Tom Stoppard, Tim Rice, Simon Gray and Harold Pinter — you might have thought this sad gap in his knowledge and experience would count as a severe professional disadvantage.

But it doesn’t. Cricket is like music. You can’t explain it, really. It’s either in your bones or it isn’t. I once sat up all night tryig to explain the rules to the American playwright Michael Weller. It was like trying to unravel a giant ball of wool. The task never ceased, nor did it get us anywhere.

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Ttonight we were shown details of a Nancy mission, which should have been shown yesterday. But, this would have affected the voting process! Each girl had to learn how to perform stunts. Ashley and Rachel proved to be really great actresses. But Barry still insisted that the Irish pro should be going home.

Jodie was just too nice and asked the stunt man if he was ok, rather than continue with the performance. So, the actresses with the most mettle were Rachel and Ashley. Even Jodie commented that she would not want to bump into Ashley in a dark alley way. Perfect credentials for a great, potential Nancy then!

When asked who was the strong actress, John Barrowman said Rachel.

The group song was “Nobody Does It Better” and again, Jessie was very weak in this number, as was Niamh. The young ones are not faring well, although the panel keep calling them the best. (more…)

Theatre lighting is a Cinderella of the technical arts, rarely mentioned by reviewers and taken for granted except when blazingly obvious, so to speak, in which case it’s probably no good.

So it’s been a mini-education in itself to serve as a judge for the first ever “Knight of the Illumination” awards, sponsored by the industry suppliers Clay Paky, and convened in the opera, dance, musical and theatre sections by lighting wizard Rick Fisher and London Variety critic David Benedict.

The winners will be announced at a dinner in June which, if it’s half as enjoyable and instructive as the lunch we had in Orso’s, Covent Garden, on Friday to come to our conclusions, will be a date worth keeping. It’s in my diary, anyway.

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This week, the producers of the show have obviously had a meeting and decided that things need to get nasty. Call me cynical, but I think because of more phone vote scandals this week, the beeb are not making much from folks calling in. I think the days of viewers ringing up to vote in these shows and hearing the engaged tone are over. Therefore, the format has been changed slightly, giving a much tougher stance, in order to get people phoning, desperate to save Andrew’s victims!

Why else would they ask each Nancy who they thought should go home? The results were interesting though, as each girl cringed as they watched one of the others slate them!

But the Lord then undoes his work later on in the show when he should have really criticised Jessie, but he backed away. Let’s look at the singers and the songs:

Jessie sang “Fighter” and it was awful. Her diction was dodgy, the performance was really shouty and she came across as really cocky. As for her posture, it now resembles an Orang-a-Tang. The panelists all agreed, except Barry and The Lord. There were ridiculous claims made that she could take the role with an Irish accent. John Barrowman looked gob-smacked. I don’t think this is a happy camp, this time around. (more…)

I was taken aback, then intrigued, when asking a colleague  if he was going to see the new King Lear at the Globe, and he replied, “I’d rather eat my own feet.”

Never mind that the show is infinitely superior to the grandiose RSC production of Trevor Nunn with Ian McKellen in the title role (which, don’t get me wrong, wasn’t as bad as Germaine Greer peevishly proclaimed) but it was the combination of “I don’t care about the Globe” (the most successful theatre in London) and the fascinating new phraseology of boredom that got me.

The thing about this new Lear is the involvement of the audience in the story. They hang on every word and twist. They simply can’t believe the eye-gouging of Gloucester. They suck in their breath. They rub their eyes. Some of them may even eat their own feet.

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